Last night I happened to glance at "The Vagina Monologues" on Television.
I was struck at how cleverly it was written and performed and how things have changed so much, even just within the last twenty years.
I was advised by an older lady only last week, not to go and see "The Black Swan" ..
When I asked why, I was told that the ballet was beautiful and the story was good, but there was an awful sex scene in it.
Being me, I giggled and said "Oh that sounds fun, what was so bad about it"
"It was disgusting, it wasn't normal .. it showed a person having sex with themselves"..
The poor woman was so disgusted by this scene, she couldn't even use the word masturbation, or maybe she didn't know the correct terminology.
I was brought up under a strict Irish Catholic influence, which even the use of tampons was frowned upon. Masturbation especially female masturbation, was just a taboo subject. It was something we all did it, but we would never dare admit to it. At the tender age of twelve, I remember being handed a booklet by my mother, The purpose of this was to explain to young girls about puberty, the menstrual cycle and eventually sex after marriage.. the object of which was procreation and not an act of pleasure.
I remember distinctly that the pamphlet warned me not to use internal sanitary protection, as it could lead to me loosing my breaking my Hymen and so losing my virginity. As my Hymen had already been lost due to a bad fall on my roller skates, I was not particularly worried about that. I also had enough sense to know, that your breaking your Hymen and loosing your virginity were totally different things. What did concern me though, was a whole chapter on pleasuring oneself.
The author of the book went on to explain, that to touch ones "Pleasure Centres" was something to be avoided..I am not exactly sure of the exact wording as it was so long ago, I just know it was something along those cryptic lines....It continued, that should however you do so, you were to make sure you did not continue until orgasm, as this process would ruin you, and any chance of a healthy future sexual relationship with your husband..
I had no idea then as to what an orgasm was, but being the total rebel and inquisitive young girl that I was, I fully intended to find out.
I am not going to give anybody a cheap thrill here, we all know how this is achieved and if you don't there are many porn blogs and self help sites available. What I do want to show you though, is an insight into how easily religion and its ridiculous rules can damage a young persons attitude to their body and future relationships.
When I did discover how to "Make the earth move"... although it was a most wonderful feeling, the pleasure was short lived as I was immediately struck with fear of fire and brimstone. I thought I had broken my body, it would not stop twitching, so I prayed to Jesus....
" Please God if you would just fix me I will never do it again.... I swear "
Jesus answered my prayer, as I calmed and everything returned to normal. I then lay there in horror and cried, as I was sure that I had ruined myself for the rest of my life.
I did not however keep my promise to him, what I had discovered was something far to good to leave alone.
Looking back on this dreadful literature, although it is not as barbaric as the mutilation of the female clitoris, performed in other religions, it could have achieved a very damaging psychological circumcision. Surely if you have a part of your anatomy with so many thousands of nerve endings, something so entirely natural, that can give you so much pleasure, something that doesn't harm anyone, that costs nothing and makes you feel so wonderful. Then surely it has to be a good thing and not an evil thing. Yet listening to this older lady, I wonder how many woman were not able to see past this propaganda.
I wonder how many women have been damaged permanently by this way of thinking?
How many marriages are ruined because, sex is just for baby making and one should not be seen to enjoy it. The poor men that must go crazy for good sex, as their partners have taught themselves not to enjoy it. Women who deem sex to be wrong or dirty, and to perform oral sex must be akin to signing a pact with Lucifer.
I feel especially sorry for all those poor catholic widows the world over, who have to keep their vibrators hidden from themselves and daren't accidentally slip whilst moisturising their bodies....just incase they break it.